the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
