Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
