Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
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