whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
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