The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize