please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Randomize
