I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
