She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Randomize
