it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
Randomize
