and next time when you feel me up, do it right
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
Randomize
