I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
well you can't waste a boner
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
