You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Watching her eat just hurts me
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize
