Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
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