did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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