bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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