His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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