I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
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