is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
His nipple licking is glorious
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