What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
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