oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
