I wanna bring you to show and tell
$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize
