I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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