I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
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