I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
