but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize
