Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize