I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
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