Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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