I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
I lost the right to judge tonight
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
