Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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