Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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