she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
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