Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
