So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Randomize
