the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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