No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
Randomize
