Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
