I'm really into asian looking animals
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
