No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
