Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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