we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
