its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
Randomize
