we have officially lost it.
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
You pole danced in your parka.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
