I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
