She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
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