You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
