He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
Randomize
