Do vagina's smell?
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
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