if you like me you must not know who I am
Me. At least after what I've been through.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
