is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize
